Well, here I am. I plan to have a whole lot of articles here eventually, but the most current will always be right here on the front page. For my first topic I will discuss... *drumroll* Chapter Two!

I can't exactly tell you about Chapter 1 - we want you to buy this book, not download it. :P

Anyway, here are some of the major things I pointed out about Chapter 2 when I looked over it - not all of them have been changed or even recognized, but you can see what I'm referring to in the first-edition Demo Chapter package.

• It worries me how much setting explication is seen at the beginning of this chapter. So far, the edits have reworded the paragraph, but not as much as I'd prefer. I call this phenomenon "verbal map-making" - it sounds as though we're trying to force you to visualize the entire world of Chrono Trigger after a single description. Personally I like Tolkien's style of settings: you hear the history of a place as the characters reach it, and much is alluded to but never outright stated.
• A small edit occurred to me as I saw the line saying [...and his mind suddenly reentered his true life] - this didn't sound appropriate for just a guy waking up, so I made an adjustment. Now it reads "...suddenly connected with his body again". Sounds better, ne?
• Another major issue, to be discussed at our eternally delayed Editor Meeting, is what kind of sword Crono should have from the start of the story. The first revision of this chapter has him with the Steel Saber. Wayne's reasoning was that he shouldn't begin with a weak weapon, and a wood sword is basically a toy. Not so. If anyone has read the Laws of Anime located here, you'll recall that one of them goes "A wooden sword is at least as sharp as a metal one, sometimes sharper". Now they, of course, were joking, but the fact remains that a skilled kendou can do some pretty interesting things with just a sharp wooden stick (or bokutou), which is not a toy but an important part of training. And it also is true that Crono really wouldn't carry a metal sword even if he had one - you're only supposed to bring out the metal weapons and armor when you seriously want to kill someone.
• In one paragraph I saw the word "as" about 4 times. I carefully shifted the words around so that there was still one as, but most of the rest were in progressive tenses.
• I fixed the color of Marle's pendant - it was denoted as "light blue", but the pendant is made of Dreamstone; it should be red like everything else made of that rock.
• I suggested that since everyone at the fair considers Silver Points to be marks on a card, it would be slightly silly to have the character's "leaving them on the floor".

So, that's it for Chapter 2, for now.

Coming soon: Chapter 3, and the Chapter 4 Bromide Issue (very strange, that one). O-tanoshimi ni ne! ^^